Thursday, April 25, 2013

Family gatherings.  A group of friends.  Co-workers.  Neighbors.  Every single day we are surrounded by all kinds of relationships in our lives.   Some days there is conflict.  Some days we get along great.

But why can’t it be great all the time?  Part of the reason relationships fluctuate is there comes a time when we feel as if we cannot be our true selves.   Quite often we pretend all is well.  Sometimes like in the situation of a family reunion, we tend to put up walls or hold our tongue and just get along out of obligation as to not cause a stir.

The reality is that if we were honest about what is going on, rather than shutting down, we would be able to get along with everyone in our lives a lot better.  When we pretend to be ‘okay’ and we are not and we do not share what is bothering us, we tend to build up resentment.   Building up resentment only builds walls and we eventually shut down and stop talking to one another.  We end up not talking about the real issue and things tend to compound and we have more and more misunderstandings.

If we took the time to discuss our problems rather than just assuming discussions would end up in conflict or arguments, chances are we would air out all the real issues and get to the root of them to actually have a mature conversation to solve our problems.

When problems keep adding up, it does not help us.  It only hurts us more and hurts the ones we care about.  

Taking the time to be ‘real’ and be courageous enough to be vulnerable to share what is really going on, is the solution to letting go of the walls, of the shells we wear out of defense.  If we are truthful with how we feel and what we think, we will find we are not alone and we actually share more common ground than we think.  It is in this discovery and revelation we soon find that communication is the solution to everything. 

~ Athena & Tess – We Solved It

Post a Comment